I am a person of faith.

I am also a person who has exactly zero certainty of what anything means.

Chalk that up to being in my twenties. And in seminary. Basically, my whole life is one perpetual, snowballing existential crisis.

I am many other things. I am a theologian, a student, a wife, a writer, an artist, a person with mental illnesses, a Green Party member, a hopeful educator, an erstwhile Christian turned pluralist, an activist, a pop culture nerd, a goofball, a lover.

I am also a heretic.

I used to get angry with this word. I thought it meant I was disingenuous, that I didn’t really believe anything I said and that I had no moral or ethical grounding. I thought it meant I was a troublemaker.

(Okay, that last one might be true.)

I minored in Greek in my undergrad days, because I have no sense of what “sanity” is. There I learned that the word “heretic” comes from the Greek word ἠρημος (heremos), which means “wilderness” or “desert.” In the second and third centuries AD, the Desert Fathers and Mothers fled to the desert to escape the world around them (which was, most likely, persecuting them) and grow closer to the Divine. John the Baptist and Jesus also did this. The desert is the place where outcasts sojourn. It is where the meek test their strengths. It is where relentless souls go to wander, not towards a destination, but for the sake of the journey.

This is my wandering the desert.


2 thoughts on “About

  1. I like your thoughts here, Denika. As to Jesus being a heretic, I think we tend to superimpose that idea onto him from later Christian practice and meaning of the term. For one, I don’t believe at all he was crucified for “heresy” or “blasphemy.” Though religious (especially apocalyptic/prophetic) views mixed into it (religion and politics were closely merged in the Judaism of Judea/Galilee), he was undoubtedly crucified by the ROMANS (with Saducee/High Priestly collaboration) as a threat to political stability (i.e., suspected if not actual sedition against Roman rule). Nothing else adequately explains all the solid data. Of course, the actual data is minimal, as Gospel accounts clearly use dramatic and polemical “license” abundantly, and add detail as desired and useful.

  2. Again, well said here. I love the way you explained this. Your thirst for truth and God over human approval comes through. It can be hard for Christians from conservative backgrounds, especially younger ones, to see past the “giant” of those calling heresy to realize they are only windmills. You’re right, “heretical” or “unorthodox” are really just ways of saying “you’re different from me” and there’s no need to fear this because Different can be Good.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s